Fear Or LOve… Boston, Texas, The World.

18th day, NaPoWriMo

 

I thought I might not ‘go’ to the tragedy of Boston, of Texas, the spots of angry fire, and fear, with all the pain of it, the anguish of it.  My inclination is to seek some joy past the horror and grief.  To not join in with the fear, to not feed it the food of my angry/sad feelings and still feel deeply, passionately, without avoidance.  Fear is not what I wish to feed.  And feelings are not for my evasion; necessary to have so they don’t build in my body and create a whole other kind of pain.  And in this mix of emotions stirred by personal and world events, I invite grace and gratitude, joy and peace, into the cauldron, while I stir in love and the spirit of Oneness that I believe we all share in.

 

I will not feed the fear

In the having of feelings

that get drench and expose

burned and seared with the

incomprehensible

 

Comprehending the allowance

of loss as it fills me

letting in what will tear

away in that vast salty

ocean of endings

 

Grateful for the salty

bouncy in the fear of

drowning rising to the

surface a buoy bobbing

seeking a safe shore

 

I will not feed the fear

in the having of feelings

that need to be felt

in the vulnerability

of living love expressively

 

Of rising to an angry

cause to pray away

unfathomable acts of

violence that feed the

fear and fearful

 

I will have my

sorrow

I will have my

rage

I will have my

Joy

I will have my

Peace

 

I will have all of me

And

Today

I will feed forgiveness