I had no good byes for you just your name on my altar Our reckoning happened long ago with so much pain It was a hard forgiveness in the way-back-then That came easy once my heart gave to that spaciousness And compassion paid my soul a visit asking for everything There could be nothing less than that full surrender Nothing less that a complete turn to Love no matter what I leaned fully into those tender arms of absolution Betraying expectations desire to have to have it returned To have to make an equal exchange of emotional fairness Covered with all Sunny sparkle and pop-up love emojis I did it for me on behalf of a deeper love that rose in the giving, in the let go, in the instant of full clarity Like the Sun came and burned my insides clean of that hurt An unexpected Phoenix rising from the death of a long ago Child wound dissolving away in the ocean of my heart That vastness makes me quake and wonder of this truth Beating gently in the center of my chest, a steady pulse A'Yes' set free in the never have to go around again I will alway remember you. You were my first paradox Rest in peace copyright. jeanne adwani
Tag Archives: LOVE ONLY LOVE
1 Jan 2020… 6
In numerology, at least the way I do it, today, this first new day of 2020, is a 6. We start the year with a number that speaks to relationships not only with other, with yourself.
In the Tarot, 6/VI is the number of the Lovers. As I feel into this card, into this day, we begin this turn of the wheel with Love as our first breath, our first inhale. I let myself take that in, fill up on that breath and move Love through my body. I tap into the many things that give rise for me when I let Love wake my heart up, open it wide, let it call me to that place of devotion. I find I tear up a little, a little smile traces across my face, a loss pushes at my edges, all sorts of feelings and thoughts rise up, and there is also this expanded feeling all over and in me that gets my heart to pump a little faster. My entire body lights up, I feel a connection to my surrounds, a noticing of the light around me, and I feel Joy in the ability to have this moment. And what I also know, is I can call up this moment at any time I want, cause I just did, which means for me that it is ever available.
For me, Love is the One Truth, it is the place where we all can connect and feel the greatness, the magnificence of what it feels to Love with out expectation, or return, or anything other than the sublime pleasure of Loving.
Might you take a moment to feel/breathe into your heart and let someone, something, that fills you up with so much Love and tenderness, you can do nothing but succumb to it, can you let that in? Can you feel that pure, unabashed, uncensored Love. How does it move in you? Can you feel it without trying to stop it or let your busy mind run over it?
Maybe, it’s easy to fill up on unconditional Love, or maybe it feels hard, or scary, we all have issues on the topic of love. Whatever it might or might not be for you, it needs no analysis, cause that is brain stuff, not heart stuff. Love does not need analyzing, even tho’ that is one of our ‘go to’ processes cause most of us want to understand the Why, of just about everything. When I drop out of my busy little mind and breathe into my heart, let go of that need to know and understand, image how Love lights me up, I can feel it rather than think it. A whole new glow starts to radiate in me.
Make resolute the quest of an open heart
The ever present Wholy Grail within
Filling and pouring,
Filling and pouring
Filling and spilling
All through the blood red radiance of Being
Pumping in a syncopated melody of
A song never having been sung over and over
Pouring the joyous music of the heart
Like an out breath sigh of tenderness
From the Wholy Grail, the heart chalice
That only needs the quest of letting Love
Be on your every inhale and exhale
Always resting on the tip of your tongue
Plumping your lips for the sweet kiss
Breathing out into the air around you